Today I talked with my girlfriend. There was a lengthy argument, featuring the correct way to write the number 5, and the Chinese education system, among other things. Then Wenwen drew something.
Observations
1. Wen wen didn't include herself in her circle. She said she just buys some things (clothes, shoes, skin creams, cat stuff), and that money can buy her happiness. Maybe she is a small dot in her circle.
2. Wen wen didn't include her daughter in my circle. Maybe she really doesn't think I include her daughter in my life.
3. I was overjoyed to see her acknowledge how much I care about her in my life. Then I was saddened to see her the second circle, a suggestion for my life's priorities. How does that even work? Am I supposed to pay less attention to her? Love her less? They say Chinese are obsessed with making money, and I don't disagree. I don't think I'm obsessed with making money. I feel like one day, in the far future, when I'm lying on my deathbed, I'll never look back and think "wow buying tons of stuff made me happy. I regret not making more money and buying more stuff." Instead, I will probably think, "I wish I tried to be friendlier and funnier with people, and brought more joy to my life and the others' lives."
3. I was overjoyed to see her acknowledge how much I care about her in my life. Then I was saddened to see her the second circle, a suggestion for my life's priorities. How does that even work? Am I supposed to pay less attention to her? Love her less? They say Chinese are obsessed with making money, and I don't disagree. I don't think I'm obsessed with making money. I feel like one day, in the far future, when I'm lying on my deathbed, I'll never look back and think "wow buying tons of stuff made me happy. I regret not making more money and buying more stuff." Instead, I will probably think, "I wish I tried to be friendlier and funnier with people, and brought more joy to my life and the others' lives."
Now back to Wen wen, her daughter, and I. We live apart. I guess we're not really a family. But I was trying to believe we were a family today.
In no small part did we argue about the difference in American and Chinese way of thinking. And how I shouldn't teach children my way of thinking. However, if I am to be a father, of course I will teach my way of thinking to my kids. It's only natural. So the conclusion was a little strange to me.
In no small part did we argue about the difference in American and Chinese way of thinking. And how I shouldn't teach children my way of thinking. However, if I am to be a father, of course I will teach my way of thinking to my kids. It's only natural. So the conclusion was a little strange to me.
A lot of our conversations are not very clear. The language barrier and difference in way of thinking muddles everything up. It's a strength if we can complement each other, harmonize, learn from each other, and work together. In doing so I hope we can feel relaxed, curious, insightful, and wondrous. Not quick to anger or exhaust. And not merely tolerating each other, but enjoying the opportunity to spend time communicating with one another.
